My client, Barbara (not her real name) is kind, generous and very, very busy.

Her calendar is packed full of appointments, events and meetings. Her cell phone rings, buzzes and beeps almost constantly with notifications that go unanswered. Her unopened emails go on for pages. Her enormous home is tidy, beautifully decorated and as warm as she is but every inch of her storage – closets, cabinets, cupboards, drawers –  are packed full. There isn’t an inch to spare.

Barbara is like the juggler who can keep ten plates spinning simultaneously at the top of ten poles without dropping them because each of them are equally important.

But when you treat everything in your life as equally important, spinning those 10 plates for days, weeks, months or even years (not just minutes) because you believe or behave as if everything is equally important, eventually one of two things happen. One or more of the plates break or you do.

It can be a quick break or a slow one but even the juggler knows when it’s time to stop.

When Barbara said to me recently that she’d turned down a number of invitations because she realized they weren’t worth her time, I felt a sense of relief for her because she was discovering that saying no meant she was finally saying yes… to herself. I also knew she had finally started to see the cost of making everything in her life equally important.

For every task, project, meeting, coffee date, or invitation you receive, before you do it, take it on or schedule it, before you say yes, ask yourself these 3 questions: 

1) Is it important to me?

Is this your priority or someone else’s?  Say yes to you before you say yes to someone else. If  you are the kind of person that likes to be helping others but find yourself doing so at your own expense, it’s okay to say, “thank you for thinking of me but I just don’t have the time right now.”

2) If I don’t do this will it cost me?

What would happen if you didn’t do it? If you’re not sure whether to take something on, imagine not doing it. You don’t want to end up spending a little effort on lot of things instead of a lot of effort on what’s truly important.

3) Is it worth my time?

Only you can answer this question. If it saves you from stress and doesn’t cost you something to say no, then say no. You’ll only be saying yes to what’s really worth your time.

The bottom line is don’t hold on to stuff, projects, even old beliefs about yourself when they are no longer useful to you. Be willing to be brave. Be willing to make hard choices for the bigger rewards. Make room in your life for what matters most!

Have you read Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less by Greg McKeown?  If not, I recommend it. Especially if you feel like you are never able to catch up or you find yourself asking, “is this all there is?”

I’m reading it now.  So much of the book’s three-word message — less but better — is resonating with me that I’ve turned almost every page of my e-book a bright shade of green from all the highlighted sections.

I was fortunate to have heard Greg speak at a conference of Professional Organizers a few years ago, before he became a New York Times best-selling author.

I was only a couple of years into running my own business but the memory of the daily grind I experienced in my previous corporate job was still fresh in my mind.  At one point, I recall, Greg explained that most of us use about 10 percent of our potential in our jobs when we are desperate to use so much more. That certainly rang true for me.   Then he asked everyone in the audience to raise their hands if they thought they were using 100 percent of their talent now. My hand shot up like a rocket.

Using 100 percent of your brain’s potential doesn’t mean spending 100% of your time in activities that leave you exhausted, overwhelmed and stressed.  It means spending your time doing things that matter most to you even if it means having to say no to things that matter most to others.

“It’s natural not to want to let go of what we wasted on a bad choice,” Greg writes, “but when we don’t, we doom ourselves to keep wasting even more.”

We all make bad choices or mistakes that we later regret. This is human. but it’s the act of realizing and then doing something different, changing course, or eliminating that choice altogether that makes us wiser.  He reminds us that “there should be no shame in admitting to a mistake; after all, we really are only admitting that we are now wiser than we once were.”

I love this idea so much that I found myself using it in a conversation I had with a young woman designer I met recently who was berating herself for getting into a project she quickly discovered was over her head.  I said to her, “how wise you are to know this now.” Not surprisingly, she had a hard time taking this in. Sometimes it’s easier to blame ourselves than it is to recognize the wisdom in our mistakes.

The same holds true for the “stuff” in our lives.  So much of what we surround ourselves with is the result of out-dated choices.  When those choices cost us, we tend to hold on to them longer. Greg refers to this as the “endowment effect” meaning our tendency to overvalue things we already own.

So much of our daily lives is spent in the act of making choices – both trivial and essential –  that mistakes are inevitable.  How many times have you bought or acquired something that later you discovered was the wrong choice but couldn’t let it go anyway?  This happens because  we force ourselves to find value in the thing, even when there is none, to justify our choice in the first place.  When I work with clients.  I often ask them, “if you saw this today, would you buy it?” Even when they say no, the pain of learning that the original choice no longer has value is sometimes hard to bare.

I believe the clutter in our lives (and in our minds)  also comes from having too many choices to begin with. We have so much already coming at us that the very act of choosing is exhausting.   There are simply too many other “more important” choices to make.  This is in essence what creates clutter.  Too many choices, too much saying yes, or simply not choosing, when we really want to say no.

But living an essential life, a life that Essentialism defines as “the space and the time to think, time to look and listen, permission to play,” invites us to ask ourselves not, how can I do it all or have it all but instead how do I recognize the essential from the trivial? It takes awareness about our motives for choosing this over that and then consciously AND deliberately asking ourselves, “is this essential to me or can my life be just as good, if not better, without it?” By choosing what is essential, we discover how life can be better, even with less.

Making plans to move doesn’t start the day you start packing.

Whether you are moving, across the street, across the country, or just temporarily while your house is being remodeled, the secret to a stress-free move is all in the preparation.

Here are 15 “Dos” and 15 “Don’ts” to help you, or those you know, plan and prepare to move without breaking the bank or your back.

Do’s

1. Do get at least two written, onsite estimates and read them carefully. Fees for supplies, materials, 2nd stops or even labor can vary widely from mover to mover.
2. Do label and if possible, separate items you are Moving (by destination), Selling, Donating or Hauling.
3. Do consider getting your high value items insured against loss or damage, especially if you are moving more than 50 miles.
4. Do give yourself plenty of time to purge if you have clutter or are downsizing your home.
5. Do hire a licensed mover with a long list of references and check their references.
6. Do plan on being there on move day to direct movers at your old home or new home if you can’t be there.
7. Do pack heavy items such as books in small boxes, light items such as pillows and lamp shades in large boxes, bulky or odd-sized items such as lamp shades, toys or tools in medium boxes. Fragile items such as crystal and china should go  in extra strong dish-packs.
8. Do have a plan for unpacking and getting organized at your new home. The average home will take 1-4 weeks to unpack depending upon the amount of items you move. Consider hiring professional organizers if you need it done more quickly.
9. Do arrange with your movers to disconnect large appliances such as washes and dryers.
10. Do make a plan for your school aged children on move day  and secure your pets in a safe place.
11. Do inspect the moving truck after your items are unloaded to be sure it’s fully emptied before movers depart.
12. Do leave folded clothes in dressers. Most movers will provide wardrobe boxes, free of charge, for your hanging clothes.
13. Do book your move first thing in the morning.
14. Do label boxes clearly so movers can get them to the right room in your new home.
15. Do consider donating or giving away your gently used boxes or see if your movers will take them back.

Don’ts

1. Don’t assume movers will be available on the day you need to move. Book 4-6 weeks ahead if possible.
2. Don’t hire movers you haven’t met with or have not been recommended by people you trust.
3. Don’t forget to pack/purge contents from storage areas, attics, sheds and offsite storage.
4. Don’t waste time scrounging for boxes and packing supplies. Gently used ones can be found online and less expensive ones at stores like Home Depot. Professional Movers can also deliver boxes/supplies
5. Don’t leave packing to the last minute. It will add to the cost of your move if your movers were not hired to pack.
6. Don’t hire a mover solely on price. Experience, knowledge of your community and skill (like moving a grand piano) counts for much more.
7. Don’t move boxes you haven’t opened since your last move.
8. Don’t call movers at the last minute with significant changes to your move. It will cost you.
9. Don’t book a move at the end of a month or in the summer, if possible. These are their busiest times.
10. Don’t water your plants for two days before you move.
11. Don’t forget to go back and check all areas of your home before your moving truck leaves.
12. Don’t forget to complete a change of address form for all your service providers and the US Mail.
13. Don’t talk to movers when they are moving heavy objects
14. Don’t forget to tip your movers if they did a good job.
15. Don’t forget to notify friends, relatives and the post office about your new address.

• You spent a lot of money on that sofa 5 years ago but it doesn’t work in your new home.
• You loved it when you bought that suit but it doesn’t fit your personality anymore.
• Your best friend talked you into buying that clock last year but it’s just not you.
• Your husband gave you a gift because he thought it was meaningful but it’s simply not your taste.

Sound familiar? What do you do?

First, forget how much you spent on it or how much it may have cost. That money is gone.

Second, it won’t serve you tucked away in some back cabinet or closet especially when you need that space for other items.

Once you’ve realized the cost of holding on to it exceeds the cost of letting it go, you have two options.

1. Donate it
2. Sell it

Keeping it is an option if you want to delay your decision even longer but that’s the very definition of clutter.

“Gifting” it to someone else is also an option but be careful that you are not simply transferring your clutter to someone else. In this case I consider “gifting” the same as donating.

The next thing you should do is decide on a dollar amount that would make it worth your time to sell it because selling an item takes a lot longer than donating. And donating takes time too.

Would you take the time to sell it if you made $10? $50? $100? More?

Let’s say for example you have an artsy, hand-painted table you bought fifteen years ago when you were living as a single person somewhere else.  Now you are married and working full-time.  It’s still in good shape but it no longer fits your more streamlined, contemporary style (or your spouse hates it).  Now there’s no place to put it so it’s just taking up space in your garage.

You paid almost a thousand dollars for it so you can’t imagine donating it.  Your kids don’t want it and you don’t have the time to refinish it.

You’ve already taken the time to find out similar used tables sell for about $200-$300.

If you decide to sell it you will need to be prepared to spend at least a couple more hours selling it. You can do this on sites like Craigslist, Amazon or Ebay, including the time to reply to emails,  be available to meet with prospective buyers and sell it in person, assuming you don’t plan on shipping it.

If you’re lucky it will sell for the price you want. If not, it’s still taking up valuable real-estate in your garage, not to mention space in your brain.

You can also donate it to a charitable organization such as Goodwill. Alternately you can donate it to a specific local charity or non-profit organization you are connected with for a fund-raising auction. Again, this will take time, more time depending upon which type of donation you choose. You can also consign but keep in mind consignment shops have the last word on whether or not they will take an item. You could end up going from store to store and still not get anyone to take it. Be sure you know and understand a consignment store’s policy before you go there.

Most people tend to overvalue the worth of their possessions. Not everyone will have a seemingly worthless vase that really is a priceless collector’s item like the ones on TV’s Antiques Roadshow.

When deciding whether or not to donate or sell, you’ll want to obtain the true estimate value of an item or items to help you decide.

Donation is not the same as disposing. When you donate an item it does continue to have worth, both tangible (the tax benefit, re-sale value) and intangible (the ‘feel good’ effect).  Incidentally,  the IRS allows for up to $500 of non-cash donations to be claimed on your taxes without having to provide proof of value for each individual item.

Does this mean you should donate the table? Not necessarily but it does depend on other factors:

• Do you have the time and willingness to sell it?
• Do you need the income right now?
• Is the item worth your time to sell given it’s actual estimated market value?
• Will donating now versus waiting to sell it help with other goals you have such as gaining more storage or more room for another hobby or interest?

If you consider all of these factors together, chances are you will know what to do. If you’re still stuck, consider asking the advice of a professional organizer or call LET’S MAKE ROOM.

We can help you make a decision you can live with.

My friend and Yogini extraordinaire, Deborah Saliby, called me on Sunday asking for my advice.

Deborah Saliby, Yoga for Health

Deborah has been teaching Yoga for more than thirty years.  There are a lot of Yoga teachers out there but relatively few hold the special certification that she does in Iyengar training. The certification signifies that she has undergone extensive training as an instructor in a particular method of Hatha Yoga called Iyengar, named for B.K.S. Iyengar, one of the foremost Yoga teachers in the world.

Whenever I have a question about Yoga, I call Deborah.  The moment I feel like my body, mind and spirit are crying out for a little restoration, Deborah is the first person I think of.  On Sunday, however, after her class, Deborah’s mind and spirit were crying out for a different kind of restoration, in her home.  I am grateful she called me.

“I want to organize three closets in my house,” she told me,
“but I’m not sure where to start.” She asked if I would mind sharing some of my professional organizing tips.  “Of course,” I told her. I enjoy it when anyone calls me with a specific organizing question. To me if you are willing to ask the question, you are definitely in the mindset to get organized.

As a professional organizer,  the most common questions I get involve the how and where of organizing, as in “how do I do this?” or “where do I start?”  Typically this follows an extended period of gradual awareness which eventually transforms into “I really wish my (fill in the blank) was more organized. But it’s not until the defining moment when the thought, “today is the day I’m going to do something about it,” that change can occur.

For my friend Deborah that moment came after she got home from teaching one of the many Yoga classes she leads in Berkeley, California.

“So where do you want to start?” I asked. “I don’t know, she said. So I probed a little more. “Which of your closets bugs you the most, that is, which has the most impact on your daily life? “My bedroom closet where I keep all my clothes,” she said, with a little giggle, “you know how much I love to shop?”

“Okay,” I said. “So why do you want to do this at all?” She explained to me that she wanted to hold a sidewalk sale. “Yes,” I said, “that’s good, but why do you want to get organized?” I asked again. “Because I can’t stand looking at the mess in my closet anymore. I know I have a lot of nice things in there that I don’t want anymore and half the time I can’t find what I’m looking for. I’m wasting time and I want to be able to wear what I love.”

Deborah understood what was bothering her about her closet but even more she knew what organizing it would mean to her (not to anyone else) and she was motivated. Plus she had the added incentive of making a little extra money. I told her, “Yeah, you could sell all the clothes you don’t want anymore and with the money you make go out and buy new ones.”  We both laughed.

I offered Deborah a step-by-step plan to get all three of her closets organized.  I shared some strategies for how to overcome some predictable obstacles such as what to do with items that had more “emotional value” than “wear-value.”  I took her through exactly what I would do with her if I were physically doing the work with her and then I asked her if she had any questions. “Nope, I’ve got it.”

Before we hung up I told her to feel free to call me when she was done with the first closet.  Even though Deborah was doing this for herself, I wanted her to know that I was interested in hearing about her progress.

The next day, Deborah did call. She sounded really happy.  She told me how she had followed my plan including emptying the entire closet first, sorting items by category, parting with what she no longer used, wore, or loved and got rid of things that brought in bad “mojo.”  She reorganized the items she kept by type and color and put aside those things she plans to include in her sidewalk sale.  In total it took her two hours. I was impressed.

“How do you feel now?” I asked her, “Great! Just walking past my closet makes me happy.”

I offered Deborah some final tips about items she was still undecided about and suggested some ways to contain items on the shelves using what she already had around her house, before saying goodbye.

After we hung up I went in to my living room and took a big breath and stretched.  Thank you for that, Deborah.

Have a question about organizing? Getting ready to move or start a home renovation project and need to get things packed, donated and organized? Call or email me. I promise you’ll come away with something you can use.

As I told Deborah, I love to be a catalyst for change.

What would you do if you learned you only had a year to live?

Fortunately, this hasn’t happened to me (at least not today) but I recently compiled a list of ten things I want to do in my life. I shared my list with a group of about 40 other women who also shared theirs during a monthly women’s social group I attend.

The idea of a “Bucket List” was made popular by the movie of the same name starring Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson. The movie is about two terminally ill men (portrayed by Nicholson and Freeman) on a final road trip with a wish list of things to do before they “kick the bucket.”

I haven’t seen the movie but I would bet that the movie character’s lists don’t veer too far from what I heard from the women in my group.  Sure, there were some creative and unusual wishes: “Get the keys to every major museum in the world (and) go in at night and wander around with an art historian,” to “Witness a contact from outer space,” but mostly I was struck by how similar our lists were.

The most common themes included the desire to experience the natural world (animals, landscapes, oceans, parks); travel; grow old to see our children (including nieces and nephews) and grandchildren thrive; be healthy or live healthier (presumably as compared to how we are now); do something creative or adventurous; learn a new skill; contribute to our communities in a meaningful and lasting way; and most, if not all wanted to experience more love in our lives either toward those closest to us, toward those we hope to meet and not surprisingly, toward ourselves.

With the possible exception of growing older in health, it was reassuring to realize that just about all these themes are achievable and for the most part, well within our control.

Yet, sadly, many of us never even get close to living our dreams. Instead we get caught up in the demands of daily life, the burden of keeping up with too much stuff and too much information (seemingly urgent but rarely important) and the false belief that our heart’s desires can only be achieved through some miraculous intervention or enormous compromise.

I am a victim of this belief as much as anyone. So much so that when I tried to imagine how I would achieve my greatest wish – to take a trip on the famed Orient Express from London through, Strasbourg and finally to Paris and back, the only way I could imagine my wish becoming reality was to wait until I was diagnosed with some terminal disease and then cash in my retirement money to pay for it (since I probably would no longer have a need for a “retirement.” )

Here is my “bucket” list if you’re curious:

1. Take a week long vacation on the actual Orient Express – London, Strasbourg, Paris, and back.
2. Visit a wildlife preserve in Africa
3. Vacation in the  North Italian coastal region of the Cinque Terre
4. Write and have a book published by a major publishing house
5. Meet Joni Mitchell
6. Be on television, featured for my expertise.
7. Learn to speak Spanish
8. Go to Esalen at Big Sur and soak in the hot tubs overlooking the Pacific
9. Get a dog
10. See the Aurora Borealis (aka the “northern lights”)

The absurdity of my realization is the essential dilemma we all face. Do we choose a life of practicality, security and presumed “peace of mind,” or do we throw the dice and risk losing it all (whatever ‘all’ is) to experience our dreams but at the possible expense of our long term survival?

I wish I had an answer to this question. I don’t. All I know is that I only have one life to live (excuse the soap opera reference) and at the end of it I’m not going to wish I’d spent more time regretting what I never did.

I attended a workshop recently where I was asked to write down my three biggest accomplishments from 2011 and then later was asked to write down my top three goals for 2012.  I was surprised to discover that my biggest accomplishments were all related to my work life while my goals for 2012 were all related to my personal life.  It dawned on me that the bigger message in this was that it was time to start shifting some time and focus to my own well-being.

The top 10 resolutions people make, if they make them at all are, in no particular order:

1. Exercise
2. Quit smoking
3. Lose weight
4. Quit drinking
5. Enjoy life more
6. More time with family
7. Get out of debt
8. Learn something new
9. Help others
10. Get organized

Some resolutions are about stopping a behavior that is destructive to you and some are about starting a behavior that will contribute to your overall quality of life.

As an organizing specialist, I believe that getting organized does both of these things. Encourages you to end a behavior that no longer serves you and helps you develop new habits that will benefit you immediately and over time. That’s why our motto is “Make Room For Your Life; Not Just Your Stuff”

Here’s an example. Let’s say you decide 2012 is the year you are finally going to be prepared for tax time.  From the standpoint of ending a negative behavior this could mean anything from, “I will not wait until the last minute to prepare my taxes,” to “I will no longer just throw my receipts in a shoebox.”

From the standpoint of starting a positive behavior this could mean anything from  “I will make this year the year I organize and capture all my expenses, income and contributions electronically so that I will have everything ready when it’s time to complete my tax form or send it to my tax preparer,” to “This is the year I will actually get my taxes done on time.”

So this year, make a resolution that doubles it’s impact on your life. But be sure it’s something you really want and are ready to commit to.  Then track your progress by setting up mini goals that make it easier for you to move closer to your larger goal.

Here’s mine for example: I want to lose weight and feel better. Rather than put it in the form of pounds, I’ve decided to put it in the form of a percentage. Why? Because there are real and measurable benefits from losing even 5% of your body weight when you are overweight (as I am).

So here’s my goal with my three mini goals to follow

• Lose 30% of my current body weight by January 2013
• Lose 20% of my current body weight by September of 2012
• Lose 10% of my current body weight by May 2o12 (my birthday month – what better present to give yourself?)
• Lose 5% of my current body weight by March 2012

So if you are reading this, you can assume I am inviting you to encourage me as I will need to meet my goal.  I will keep you posted and if you like, send me your thoughts, encouragement, ideas and anything else you want to say that will keep me motivated.  Feel free to also send them to LET’S MAKE ROOM’s Facebook page  (http://www.facebook.com/Letsmakeroom) or my Twitter Feed @letsmakeroom or hashtag #letsmakeroom

Here’s to a healthier, happier and more caring 2012!

If you’ve lived in the same home for 10, 20, 30 or more years, and decided to move into a smaller space, there is a term professional organizers and others such as realtors have adopted from the business world. It’s called downsizing.

In business, downsizing has a negative connotation as it generally means that people will lose their jobs. In the world of organizing, however, downsizing refers to a conscious and deliberate process of reducing the contents of one’s home prior to a move to a smaller space. Although the use of the term in this context is thought of as neutral, people who undergo the process of downsizing may feel otherwise. This is particularly true if you are older, retired or living alone as you will probably need to make decisions about whether or not to keep literally hundreds of items before your actual move day.

Complicating this fact, is that as we get older the part of our brain that helps us with mental tasks such as organizing and prioritizing, otherwise known as the “executive function,” does not work as well as it used to. This isn’t our fault. It’s just a normal process of aging.

When preparing to downsize in preparation for a move, here are a few strategies I recommend to help minimize the stress and uncertainty you may experience.

1. Plan ahead. Start thinking about and planning for your move at least 6 months before you put your house on the market. This could include talking to family members about your plans, determining your needs and goals for your next home and perhaps even researching or visiting other communities you are potentially interested in moving to.

2. Take the time to survey your belongings. Make a point of sharing memories and stories they evoke with those who have offered to help you get ready to move. You may even wish to record those stories in writing or with the use of a tape recorder well before you start packing.

3. Don’t try to do it all yourself. Delegate physical tasks such as sorting, categorizing, packing, transporting and moving to professionals or trusted friends. Elicit ideas and suggestions so you can benefit from the expertise and experience of others who do this professionally or who are knowledgeable about the process.

4. Keep only what you need, love or can’t replace. Don’t become a hoarder. Hoarding is distinguished from collecting in that collecting generally involves objects considered by others to be both interesting and valuable. Hoarding, on the other hand, involves keeping large quantities of things that appear to be useless or of limited value so much so that it compromises your ability to use your home as it was intended. The decision about what to keep and what to sell, donate, or dispose of is yours but only keep what you truly love, will use again or can’t easily replace.

5. Make your wishes clear from the start. If you prefer to be consulted with on certain decisions let others know that in the beginning. Talk openly about how you appreciate help and be willing to accept it when offered. However if you are feeling anxious, say so and take a break. The less anxious you feel, the easier it will be to make decisions you can live with.

6. Conserve your energy. While you think you may be able to work for four or five hours at a time, in reality you may only be effective for two. Commit to doing a specific number of tasks such as packing three boxes, instead of a whole room. If you enjoy it, do so while watching your favorite TV show or listening to music.

7. Don’t hold back (or apologize for) your emotions. Moving is stressful for everyone at any age. As you prepare for your move, you may experience everything from the joy of remembering a happy event to the sadness of grieving the loss of a loved one. Give yourself permission to feel these emotions and recognize that they are a normal response to the circumstances. Your emotions won’t hurt you but suppressing them may. If possible, talk to someone you know and trust who can listen and empathize.

Lis Golden McKinley, M.A., is CEO of LET’S MAKE ROOM, a professional organizing company serving clients in all five counties of the San Francisco Bay Area and beyond. For more information, visit their website at https://www.letsmakeroom.com or call them at 510-846-1976 to schedule a complimentary phone consultation.

People often say they can’t get things done because they are too disorganized.

The causes of disorganization can be both personal as well as situational. In either case it requires an ability to make effective decisions.

Even with plenty of space, you can still be disorganized. Why? Because getting organized requires taking action and action requires decision making.  Disorganization is often the result of delayed decision making or deficits in decision making. If you find you have difficulty making decisions it may be because:

1. The task ahead of you is too overwhelming
2. You are afraid that you’ll lose something or accidentally get rid of something you’ll need later
3. You group important and non-important items together
4. You don’t have the time, mental capacity or physical ability to devote to organizing
5. People around you do not support your organizing goals and may even sabotage them intentionally or otherwise
6. You don’t have a system for maintaining your changes once you’ve made them. In other words having a S Y S T E M will Save You Space Time Energy and Money
7. Your space does not efficiently accommodate the stuff you have such as a poorly designed closet or a storage area is inaccessible, broken or filled to capacity
8. You’re afraid of the consequence of your decision
9. You’re not really motivated to decide – that is there’s nothing compelling you enough to take an action
10. Poor health in the moment or on an ongoing basis. This can be temporary such as fatigue or more chronic such as neurological conditions that affect your brain’s ability to distinguish between options.

If you experience these or any other moments of indecisiveness, try one of these ideas to get you unstuck:

1. Give yourself less options: Instead of focusing on all that you have to do, choose the two that get your attention the most and pick one of them. (Flip a coin if you have to.)
2. Ask yourself if making the decision will improve your life in any way and if so, how?
3. Recognize that not everything is important and that some things are more important than others. Imagine you had one hour to leave your home, what would you take with you? What would you leave behind? What do you know you would be able to find again if you had to?
4. Understand and accept your limitations. Most of us are good at some things but not at everything. Not even dentists can fill their own cavities.
5. Take the advice of people who have what you want. Don’t listen to people who discourage you if you suspect they don’t have your best interests at heart or if they have something to gain from your staying stuck.
6. Look for alternatives. If you can’t afford the high-end closet organizing system you dream about, get a design estimate for one anyway, then look for ways you can build or create your own system that will accomplish the same functional goals even if you have to let go of the pretty wood finishes.
7. Imagine the worst. Go ahead, take yourself through the scenario of what you are really afraid of and then ask yourself, “Is it true?” or “Will this really happen?” If you are convinced it will,  then try a different route.
8. Get absolutely clear on what’s in it for you.  What would you stand to gain or lose? Is this really that important to you? If not, then it’s not going to motivate you to take action. Find something that you absolutely care about without question.
9. Do nothing for a while and wait to see if anything changes. Do you feel worse? Are others impacted by your indecision and do their feelings matter to you? Are you stressed by your own inaction? These are the times to ask for help since you know that something has to change but you know you can’t do it alone.
10. Ask yourself what is this costing me in terms of my time, money or my quality of life? Are you spending your time doing what you want to be doing? Are you able to afford what you need and a few extras too without feelings stressed about the consequences? Does your life feel rich with the things that really matter to you be them friends, family, community, a sense of purpose, fun, health or whatever else makes you happy? If not, then it’s time to make a change.

When you begin an organizing project, regardless of whether it’s your closet, garage, kitchen or another room in your home, it’s likely you will come across something that you can’t decide about letting go or keeping. Choosing not to decide or “deferred decision-making” is one of the leading causes of household clutter.

So how do you know what to keep (or toss) if you’re not sure what it’s worth to you?

Here’s an easy guide to help you make a decision you can live with.

Start by placing the object you are trying to decide about in front of you then ask yourself each of the five questions below, in the order they appear:

1. Do I love it? This means the item gives you a great deal of pleasure, you associate it with a happy memory or you enjoy having it in your life now.  If not, ask yourself:
2. Have I used this item recently or do I expect to use it again soon in its current condition? Not everything you own, you’ll love but some things are worth keeping because they still serve you in some way. If you don’t love it, it needs repairing and you haven’t used it recently, ask yourself:
3. Would keeping this item add value to my day-to-day life now? Perhaps this is an item you know you’ll need at a certain time of year or for a particular event or purpose such as for travel or for the Holidays.  If you can’t think of a way the item adds value to your life now, ask yourself:
4. If I didn’t have this, would I choose to replace it? If yes, keep it. Otherwise, ask yourself:
5. Could someone else benefit from this item in its current condition? If you answer yes, then it’s time for the item to find new life somewhere else.  Consider donating or if it’s worth your time, sell it. If not, then recycle it or dispose of it safely.

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