I just hung up the phone with a client who I helped move to Seattle from Oakland.  She called me to tell me she was walking around IKEA shopping and was going to be going to a party later that night for which she had prepared a dish to bring with her. None of this sounds particularly life-changing, but in fact it was.

Two months ago I met my client for the first time.  Carol (not her real name) is a 70-year old woman, divorced with no children, who had been living in her home on a quiet residential street in Oakland for almost thirty years.  A year before our first meeting, Carol had decided it was time to retire and start fresh. Unfortunately, when we met she was no closer to her dream than she had been a year earlier.

She told me she wanted to travel and and socialize more.  She also knew she had to “simplify her life” because she had already signed a lease on a new apartment in Seattle that was half the size of her existing home.

Carol was an accomplished artist, graphic designer and marketing specialist.  She also loved to travel and over the years had collected various souvenirs, books, nick-nacks and other memorabilia.  Her home was musty, and the smell reminded me of my grandmother’s house.  She still had not gone through the items retrieved from her mother, who had died some years earlier.  The house had more furniture than would ever fit into her new home. She had some hard choices to make.

Carol grew up in the mid-west and moved to California to pursue her design career.  She later went on to work for a large bank and then, like many others, watched a lifetime worth of savings practically vanish overnight, the result of people she put her trust in that turned out to be anything but trustworthy.

Raised by a take-charge woman, a pioneer of the women’s movement, who returned to school in her 60s to earn her bachelor’s degree, Carol had clearly inherited her mother’s tenacity. She found a new job that while, less than satisfying, enabled her to save and retire with enough income to never have to think twice about her decision to “start fresh” at 70.

The first time I met Carol (she got my name from her Real Estate agent), she was clearly exited about her new home, an active retirement community she had discovered while visiting her sister who lived near by.  Carol had already started furnishing it and would periodically go there to stay.  Meanwhile, back in her home in Oakland, she was struggling to motivate herself to empty her old house.  She had yet to hire a mover (something I ultimately helped her with)  and was baffled about how she was going to get her old car out of the garage so that the remaining items in her home could be stored there until they could be liquidated, donated or removed.   (I eventually got it hauled away and donated.)

Time and money were ticking away as loudly as the clock above her kitchen door. The resulting stress was causing Carol to feel virtually paralyzed by the long list of “to-dos” I knew we needed to get done if she was ever going to get to Seattle.

We talked a lot but while we talked we worked. Room by room, shelf by shelf, drawer by drawer, Carol and I took what I heard another organizer once refer to as “a reverse shopping trip.”  A deliberate and at times painful process (more for my clients, less so for me) of deciding what to keep and what to leave behind.

Along the way Carol bravely confronted a lifetime of memories, regrets, harsh self-critical voices, not to mention some interesting and albeit, curious collections of bags, bottles, baubles and boxes.

Our journey together was part support group, part-family therapy, part art history lesson and occasionally part-game show, especially when she cheerfully would take on my playful challenge to edit a collection of travel bags while I timed her. (In truth, I never really paid close attention to the time – it was just the idea of making it fun that mattered.)

One day I had an assistant of mine come to help us move some of the heavier items out of the garage. In the process we came across literally hundreds of Carol’s drawings, paintings, designs and sketches from her days as an art student and professional designer. They brought memories of her childhood home in the mid-west, stories about her art school teachers, and doubts about whether she really had talent or not. She did and I suspect still does. As I often told her,  “once an artist, always an artist.”

Our work together moved between the sublime to the surprising when together we found items she had thought had long been lost to the practical, problem solving challenges that frequently come when you are trying to empty out a home (and garage) filled with a lifetime of memories.

One day, while sorting her closet, I pulled out a beautiful, eggplant colored coat with a red satin lining. She told me about the designer and how she used to love to wear it out but added with some regret, it no longer fits me.  When I asked her what she wanted to do with it, she said, “I want you to have it.” When I told her how much I appreciated the gesture, but that I couldn’t accept it, she told me, “You’ve been almost like a daughter to me. I never had a daughter of my own but if I had, I would have given her this coat.” I thought, this was the real gift.

Just like Carol’s beautiful coat, for a time our lives can fit us until eventually we outgrow them – they no longer fit the lives we have or want now.  Carol didn’t want that coat and she was ready to let go of it. When she opened the closet to find it again, it was like she had opened the door to a new life.

She moved through that door, not without difficulty and not without fear.   Helping her move through that doorway and watching her come out the other side, into her new life, is what makes me do the the work I do.  And I love it.

What would you do if you learned you only had a year to live?

Fortunately, this hasn’t happened to me (at least not today) but I recently compiled a list of ten things I want to do in my life. I shared my list with a group of about 40 other women who also shared theirs during a monthly women’s social group I attend.

The idea of a “Bucket List” was made popular by the movie of the same name starring Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson. The movie is about two terminally ill men (portrayed by Nicholson and Freeman) on a final road trip with a wish list of things to do before they “kick the bucket.”

I haven’t seen the movie but I would bet that the movie character’s lists don’t veer too far from what I heard from the women in my group.  Sure, there were some creative and unusual wishes: “Get the keys to every major museum in the world (and) go in at night and wander around with an art historian,” to “Witness a contact from outer space,” but mostly I was struck by how similar our lists were.

The most common themes included the desire to experience the natural world (animals, landscapes, oceans, parks); travel; grow old to see our children (including nieces and nephews) and grandchildren thrive; be healthy or live healthier (presumably as compared to how we are now); do something creative or adventurous; learn a new skill; contribute to our communities in a meaningful and lasting way; and most, if not all wanted to experience more love in our lives either toward those closest to us, toward those we hope to meet and not surprisingly, toward ourselves.

With the possible exception of growing older in health, it was reassuring to realize that just about all these themes are achievable and for the most part, well within our control.

Yet, sadly, many of us never even get close to living our dreams. Instead we get caught up in the demands of daily life, the burden of keeping up with too much stuff and too much information (seemingly urgent but rarely important) and the false belief that our heart’s desires can only be achieved through some miraculous intervention or enormous compromise.

I am a victim of this belief as much as anyone. So much so that when I tried to imagine how I would achieve my greatest wish – to take a trip on the famed Orient Express from London through, Strasbourg and finally to Paris and back, the only way I could imagine my wish becoming reality was to wait until I was diagnosed with some terminal disease and then cash in my retirement money to pay for it (since I probably would no longer have a need for a “retirement.” )

Here is my “bucket” list if you’re curious:

1. Take a week long vacation on the actual Orient Express – London, Strasbourg, Paris, and back.
2. Visit a wildlife preserve in Africa
3. Vacation in the  North Italian coastal region of the Cinque Terre
4. Write and have a book published by a major publishing house
5. Meet Joni Mitchell
6. Be on television, featured for my expertise.
7. Learn to speak Spanish
8. Go to Esalen at Big Sur and soak in the hot tubs overlooking the Pacific
9. Get a dog
10. See the Aurora Borealis (aka the “northern lights”)

The absurdity of my realization is the essential dilemma we all face. Do we choose a life of practicality, security and presumed “peace of mind,” or do we throw the dice and risk losing it all (whatever ‘all’ is) to experience our dreams but at the possible expense of our long term survival?

I wish I had an answer to this question. I don’t. All I know is that I only have one life to live (excuse the soap opera reference) and at the end of it I’m not going to wish I’d spent more time regretting what I never did.

I attended a workshop recently where I was asked to write down my three biggest accomplishments from 2011 and then later was asked to write down my top three goals for 2012.  I was surprised to discover that my biggest accomplishments were all related to my work life while my goals for 2012 were all related to my personal life.  It dawned on me that the bigger message in this was that it was time to start shifting some time and focus to my own well-being.

The top 10 resolutions people make, if they make them at all are, in no particular order:

1. Exercise
2. Quit smoking
3. Lose weight
4. Quit drinking
5. Enjoy life more
6. More time with family
7. Get out of debt
8. Learn something new
9. Help others
10. Get organized

Some resolutions are about stopping a behavior that is destructive to you and some are about starting a behavior that will contribute to your overall quality of life.

As an organizing specialist, I believe that getting organized does both of these things. Encourages you to end a behavior that no longer serves you and helps you develop new habits that will benefit you immediately and over time. That’s why our motto is “Make Room For Your Life; Not Just Your Stuff”

Here’s an example. Let’s say you decide 2012 is the year you are finally going to be prepared for tax time.  From the standpoint of ending a negative behavior this could mean anything from, “I will not wait until the last minute to prepare my taxes,” to “I will no longer just throw my receipts in a shoebox.”

From the standpoint of starting a positive behavior this could mean anything from  “I will make this year the year I organize and capture all my expenses, income and contributions electronically so that I will have everything ready when it’s time to complete my tax form or send it to my tax preparer,” to “This is the year I will actually get my taxes done on time.”

So this year, make a resolution that doubles it’s impact on your life. But be sure it’s something you really want and are ready to commit to.  Then track your progress by setting up mini goals that make it easier for you to move closer to your larger goal.

Here’s mine for example: I want to lose weight and feel better. Rather than put it in the form of pounds, I’ve decided to put it in the form of a percentage. Why? Because there are real and measurable benefits from losing even 5% of your body weight when you are overweight (as I am).

So here’s my goal with my three mini goals to follow

• Lose 30% of my current body weight by January 2013
• Lose 20% of my current body weight by September of 2012
• Lose 10% of my current body weight by May 2o12 (my birthday month – what better present to give yourself?)
• Lose 5% of my current body weight by March 2012

So if you are reading this, you can assume I am inviting you to encourage me as I will need to meet my goal.  I will keep you posted and if you like, send me your thoughts, encouragement, ideas and anything else you want to say that will keep me motivated.  Feel free to also send them to LET’S MAKE ROOM’s Facebook page  (http://www.facebook.com/Letsmakeroom) or my Twitter Feed @letsmakeroom or hashtag #letsmakeroom

Here’s to a healthier, happier and more caring 2012!

The famous comedian, Groucho Marx once said, “I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.”

I grew up with a family of non-joiners. This got passed down to me in many ways. I never was a Girl Scout (or a Brownie) as all my friends were. I didn’t attend Sunday school.  I never played team sports, except one summer when I joined my camp’s co-ed softball team and they put me in left field hoping I’d never have to catch a ball.   I never joined clubs in high school. I didn’t even attend my high school graduation, although once I volunteered to MC a high school fashion show but was  replaced by a young Puerto Rican kid who wore jeans with sharp creases that I envied. My mother never ironed any of my jeans. She was too busy working a full-time job as a copywriter.

So when I started my own business, I learned quickly that getting business meant I was going to have to renounce my family’s anti-social culture and become ‘a joiner.’

The first group I joined was the one for my industry, the National Association of Professional Organizers also known as NAPO.  I have been a member of NAPO for almost three years.  Just learning  there was a group for organizers was a huge relief. It meant that I wasn’t crazy to think I could make money helping people avoid or at least reduce chaos in their lives.  I was always good at this, but getting paid for it? Sign me up!

Joining NAPO was a great way to embody my new organizer identity and meet other like-minded professionals who, like me, discovered their passion for helping people find the space in their homes, offices and lives to focus on what truly mattered to them.

After NAPO, I joined another related group called the Institute for Challenging Disorganization or ICD.  ICD started as a subgroup of NAPO in 1992 but eventually split off to become it’s own organization. It’s focus is education and research about chronic disorganization, more popularly known as “hoarding.” Their mission is to help people with chronic disorganization, but they are also a great resource for professional organizers and other related professionals such as mental health counselors.  ICD offers its members free teleclasses on a variety of subjects related to the understanding, treatment and support of people who have been impacted by this sometimes crippling need to acquire and hoard. For me, as an organizer, it has helped me better understand my clients tendencies toward disorganization as I believe the seeds of hoarding exist in all of us.

I am also part of a group called EBUG. For months I couldn’t remember what the acronym stood for so I just called it East Bay Uncommon Girls. It’s actually East Bay UNITED Gals though I’m not sure exactly what unites us other than we are all women looking to have some more fun and friendship in our lives.

EBUG, which currently claims about 200 members, was started by a group of four friends so they would have more opportunities to socialize and feel less isolated after a long day’s work.  EBUG is known as “the book club without the books.” It’s perfect for someone like me who hasn’t read a piece of fiction since Clinton was in the White House. EBUG meets roughly once a month for all kinds of interesting and fun member-led events such as chocolate and wine tastings, kayaking, outdoor hiking, palmistry and Tarot card readings, movie nights, barbeques and belly dancing.

I originally joined thinking it would be a great opportunity to network without the usual pressure to collect business cards but it’s turned out to be so much more. I’ve made some great new friends (who thought that would be possible in mid-life?) and after nearly 25 years of living in California actually feel part of a community, not a geographic one but a community of smart, savvy, fun-loving women. Now that I think of it, maybe that’s why it’s call United gals.

Earlier this year, I went to a networking event sponsored by the Mount Diablo Business Women, or MDBW,  a group whose mission is to enhance it’s members “business, social, professional, and personal well being.” I first learned about this group from someone I met at EBUG.

I confess,  I went initially because it was held at a really nice hotel.  I figured if the meeting was a bust I could still walk around the elegant, marble-floored lobby and pretend I was a guest. Instead, what I discovered was another great group of women, only these women, had taken the plunge to start their own businesses, like me.   MDBW is not so much about exchanging business cards as it is  about developing relationships and learning new skills and perspectives as fellow travelers on the road to success.  Besides, that the food is really good!

Then, this past September you could say I really drank the Kool-aid. I joined BNI.  BNI stands for Business Networking International.  It is the networking group of all networking groups. Their whole philosophy can be boiled down into their two word motto, “givers gain” or to give it a more street interpretation, ‘I watch your back, you watch mine.’

According to it’s website, BNI generated business referrals resulting in $2.8 billion worth of business for its’ members in the past year. It was founded in 1985 by Dr. Ivan Misner, an author, columnist and networking guru.

I joined BNI for one reason. I wanted more business.  The meeting format is not for the faint of heart. Some have even called it ‘cult-like.’ I prefer to think of it as enthusiastically supportive. Each group works on a one-profession-per-chapter model to eliminate competition or the perception of it within each group. Before I joined, I almost joined. Two years earlier I had learned about BNI from someone I knew through EBUG.  I submitted an application (yes, one needs to be approved by the individual chapter members) then subsequently withdrew it because I just wasn’t ready.

Membership really depends on your ability to make referrals, and that requires knowing people and being in situations to know more of them. It also means being a serious business owner. The cost to join is steep (about $1000 a year) for a sole proprietor but I expect to make back my investment soon.   So two years after I almost joined,  the stars aligned to let me know I was ready this time around.  It came in the form of another organizer who told me there was an “opening” for an organizer at my group, which by the way, meets at the ungodly hour of 7 a.m. every Tuesday. Still, I have to say that I am really glad I joined. Partly because I genuinely like the people – people’s true colors are vivid that early in the morning – and partly because they have a great track record of upholding the ‘givers gain’ model.  It’s like knowing you got the best seat in the house or got picked to play on the winning team.

Having never been on any team (with the exception of that camp softball league) I have to confess, in spite of my anti-social upbringing, I like it.  With all due respect to Groucho and my family, being a joiner, afterall, ain’t that bad.

If you’ve lived in the same home for 10, 20, 30 or more years, and decided to move into a smaller space, there is a term professional organizers and others such as realtors have adopted from the business world. It’s called downsizing.

In business, downsizing has a negative connotation as it generally means that people will lose their jobs. In the world of organizing, however, downsizing refers to a conscious and deliberate process of reducing the contents of one’s home prior to a move to a smaller space. Although the use of the term in this context is thought of as neutral, people who undergo the process of downsizing may feel otherwise. This is particularly true if you are older, retired or living alone as you will probably need to make decisions about whether or not to keep literally hundreds of items before your actual move day.

Complicating this fact, is that as we get older the part of our brain that helps us with mental tasks such as organizing and prioritizing, otherwise known as the “executive function,” does not work as well as it used to. This isn’t our fault. It’s just a normal process of aging.

When preparing to downsize in preparation for a move, here are a few strategies I recommend to help minimize the stress and uncertainty you may experience.

1. Plan ahead. Start thinking about and planning for your move at least 6 months before you put your house on the market. This could include talking to family members about your plans, determining your needs and goals for your next home and perhaps even researching or visiting other communities you are potentially interested in moving to.

2. Take the time to survey your belongings. Make a point of sharing memories and stories they evoke with those who have offered to help you get ready to move. You may even wish to record those stories in writing or with the use of a tape recorder well before you start packing.

3. Don’t try to do it all yourself. Delegate physical tasks such as sorting, categorizing, packing, transporting and moving to professionals or trusted friends. Elicit ideas and suggestions so you can benefit from the expertise and experience of others who do this professionally or who are knowledgeable about the process.

4. Keep only what you need, love or can’t replace. Don’t become a hoarder. Hoarding is distinguished from collecting in that collecting generally involves objects considered by others to be both interesting and valuable. Hoarding, on the other hand, involves keeping large quantities of things that appear to be useless or of limited value so much so that it compromises your ability to use your home as it was intended. The decision about what to keep and what to sell, donate, or dispose of is yours but only keep what you truly love, will use again or can’t easily replace.

5. Make your wishes clear from the start. If you prefer to be consulted with on certain decisions let others know that in the beginning. Talk openly about how you appreciate help and be willing to accept it when offered. However if you are feeling anxious, say so and take a break. The less anxious you feel, the easier it will be to make decisions you can live with.

6. Conserve your energy. While you think you may be able to work for four or five hours at a time, in reality you may only be effective for two. Commit to doing a specific number of tasks such as packing three boxes, instead of a whole room. If you enjoy it, do so while watching your favorite TV show or listening to music.

7. Don’t hold back (or apologize for) your emotions. Moving is stressful for everyone at any age. As you prepare for your move, you may experience everything from the joy of remembering a happy event to the sadness of grieving the loss of a loved one. Give yourself permission to feel these emotions and recognize that they are a normal response to the circumstances. Your emotions won’t hurt you but suppressing them may. If possible, talk to someone you know and trust who can listen and empathize.

Lis Golden McKinley, M.A., is CEO of LET’S MAKE ROOM, a professional organizing company serving clients in all five counties of the San Francisco Bay Area and beyond. For more information, visit their website at https://www.letsmakeroom.com or call them at 510-846-1976 to schedule a complimentary phone consultation.

Need an incentive to finally get organized? How about money? Of course getting organized will make you more productive at work or help you enjoy your life more at home but these days it’s all about “the Benjamins.” So because your time is money, here are just 10 simple ways you can make and save your money as you get out from under your clutter.

1. Sell your good quality, “gently” used and unwanted stuff. You can do this online such as on ebay, Amazon, Etsy, Craigslist or if you prefer a more personal approach, take it to a local consignment shop or hold a garage or yard sale.
2. Donate your stuff and get a tax deduction. Want to know how much your donated stuff is really worth? Check out Itsdeductible.com
3. Open your mail. You’ll be amazed when you find refund checks or other payments you overlooked. By doing so, you’ll avoid late fees or interest charges for unpaid or late bills.
4. Organize your paper piles.  By doing so you’ll probably find some unused gift cards or gift certificates. One client of mine discovered a stock certificate worth $5,000.
5. Organize your closet and find hidden money. It generally hides in places like your coat pockets, purses, between your sofa cushions and in those old pair of jeans you were planning to donate.
6. Organize your pantry and avoid wasting money on duplicate items.  This way you avoid having ten cans of diced tomatoes when you only need two.
7. Organize your kitchen so you can finally cook at home and avoid having to eat out or bring home expensive take-out food.
8. Host a swap party to give away things to friends and get things for free that you otherwise might have purchased.
9. Always ask yourself, “Do I really need this?”
10. Unpack that box! The one you’ve taken with you (and probably paid your movers for taking) each time you’ve moved.

Paper. No matter how much we hear about going paperless, it’s still a fact of life that paper in every form whether it be junk mail, supermarket coupons, business cards, magazine clippings, bills or receipts will continue to be part of our lives for the foreseeable future.

There are really only four ways you can manage the inflow of paper:

1. Stop it before it starts
2. Determine if you must act on it
3. Determine if you must or need to hold on to it (or really want to)
4. Toss it

Stopping it before it starts. This is akin to the prevention approach. Depending upon the type of paper you have, you may want to consider some of the following approaches
• Get off mailing lists. Contact the Direct Marketing Association at dmachoice.org
• Stop printing website pages from the Internet. Of if you must, only print those that are associated with a task or action you plan to take.
• Don’t take what you don’t need. Just because they hand it to you doesn’t mean you keep it. If your local supermarket hands you a coupon at the register, unless it’s an item you know you will buy don’t keep it and ask the cashier to dispose of it.
• Be a business card snob. Only take business cards for those people and organizations that you probably (not maybe) would do business with. If someone hands you their card that you know you will never refer to, politely decline by saying, “I know how valuable these are to you, please share it with someone who can benefit from your expertise.” Or a more direct approach, “Thank you for offering but in my effort to go paperless, please save this for someone else.”
• Stop clipping magazine and newspaper articles. Seriously, when was the last time you actually looked in that file and did something with that article? When you clip an article you are actually contracting for your own time. What is your time worth? With everything else you have to do, are you really going to make this recipe? Are you really going to going to invest in a marble countertop? It’s great to keep a single file or box of images that inspire you, but rather than keep every picture related to the hobby you think you plan to do “some day” – use the time instead to focus on ways you can actually do that hobby today!

For all other pieces of paper, you should ask yourself, “Is there a necessary action I need to take with this?” If so, then take the action and dispose of it or file it if you’ve been advised to when you’re done.

If there is no necessary action associated with that piece of paper, then you should be keeping it for one of the following reasons only:
1. You have been advised to by a financial professional. Examples would be your tax return or record of business expenses.
2. It would be difficult to replace such as a passport, birth certificate or deed.
3. It’s a record of where your money comes from and goes to such as an unpaid bill or a recent investment statement.
4. You know you will reference it again and probably more than once such as frequently called numbers, vendor information or mailing labels.
5. It has strong emotional value such as a cherished photograph or sentiment from a loved one AND would be dearly missed if lost.

Whatever is left over, according to to the National Association of Professional Organizers, there is an 80 percent chance you will probably never refer to it again except when you decide it’s time to purge your files.

This is the very definition of paper clutter. You keep it but it serves no purpose for you. If this is the case for you then ask yourself, “If this piece of paper were to disappear, what would it cost me in terms of lost time, money or information?” If the answer is nothing or probably nothing, then it’s time for the shred or recycle bin.

For more practical tips on organizing your life at home or at work, subscribe to Back On Track, the e-guide to organizing living from LET’S MAKE ROOM.

I recently worked with a team of professional organizers to help a woman who was forced to leave her home because of an extreme condition she had called “Hoarding Disorder.” Her home was declared inhabitable because of the amount of clutter she acquired.

According to the proposed revision of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual, Fifth Edition, (DSMV-proposed), Hoarding Disorder is a condition marked by a “persistent difficulty discarding or parting with possessions regardless of their actual value… leading to a large accumulation of possessions that fill up active living areas of the home or workplace so that their intended use is no longer possible.”

She lived in a quiet residential neighborhood just outside of San Francisco. Unbeknownst to her neighbors, every inch of her home was filled, much of it in plastic bags piled to the ceiling.  She couldn’t move from one room to the next without having to climb over literally thousands of possessions, much of it soiled by dirt, animals and mold.

When her house was condemned, she moved in with a friend.  Her family had long given up on trying to help her.  Her friend persuaded her that it was time to deal with her “hoarding”  after watching a show about others like her. It was hard to believe that she needed to be convinced. Its not that it didn’t matter to her that she had lost her home; it was the idea of letting anything go that was so too painful.  When she spotted a broken, plastic souvenir baseball cup, inadvertently thrown away by one of my colleagues, she became so angry she threatened to “fire” us all.  The only thing she bear to remove from her home was herself.

When I’m working with clients who I consider more “situationally” disorganized, as opposed to “chronically” disorganized, that is, people for whom disorganization is more related to existing circumstances, stress or learned behaviors, not an underlying psychological condition, I think about the fine line between them and this woman.

Many of us have an inexplicable attachment to objects, behaviors, ideas, memories and even people that don’t serve us (or no longer serve us) and yet we can’t seem to free ourselves of them. It’s not until the pain of these attachments exceeds the pain of letting them go that we begin to find the readiness to open ourselves up to the possibility of something better.

Despite the pain of losing her home, this woman had an enormously high threshold for the pain caused by her own behaviors. Her attachment to her objects, the memories they evoked, even the parts of herself they represented were more important to her than the possibility of a life filled with meaning rather than things.  It was the things themselves that gave her meaning, or more accurately, she gave them meaning. She could not let go of her possessions because they were the symbols (both real and imagined) of a life she once had and probably lost.

So if you are reading this and thinking, “I’m nothing like this woman,” ask yourself, “What are the things, behaviors, ideas, memories or people in my life that are holding me back?” Are you ready to shed them to make room in your life for something more meaningful, a greater connection to yourself perhaps? If so, consider yourself fortunate. You may want to reflect on  feeling gratitude for having more than you need. It’s unlikely that this woman will ever feel that way.

People often say they can’t get things done because they are too disorganized.

The causes of disorganization can be both personal as well as situational. In either case it requires an ability to make effective decisions.

Even with plenty of space, you can still be disorganized. Why? Because getting organized requires taking action and action requires decision making.  Disorganization is often the result of delayed decision making or deficits in decision making. If you find you have difficulty making decisions it may be because:

1. The task ahead of you is too overwhelming
2. You are afraid that you’ll lose something or accidentally get rid of something you’ll need later
3. You group important and non-important items together
4. You don’t have the time, mental capacity or physical ability to devote to organizing
5. People around you do not support your organizing goals and may even sabotage them intentionally or otherwise
6. You don’t have a system for maintaining your changes once you’ve made them. In other words having a S Y S T E M will Save You Space Time Energy and Money
7. Your space does not efficiently accommodate the stuff you have such as a poorly designed closet or a storage area is inaccessible, broken or filled to capacity
8. You’re afraid of the consequence of your decision
9. You’re not really motivated to decide – that is there’s nothing compelling you enough to take an action
10. Poor health in the moment or on an ongoing basis. This can be temporary such as fatigue or more chronic such as neurological conditions that affect your brain’s ability to distinguish between options.

If you experience these or any other moments of indecisiveness, try one of these ideas to get you unstuck:

1. Give yourself less options: Instead of focusing on all that you have to do, choose the two that get your attention the most and pick one of them. (Flip a coin if you have to.)
2. Ask yourself if making the decision will improve your life in any way and if so, how?
3. Recognize that not everything is important and that some things are more important than others. Imagine you had one hour to leave your home, what would you take with you? What would you leave behind? What do you know you would be able to find again if you had to?
4. Understand and accept your limitations. Most of us are good at some things but not at everything. Not even dentists can fill their own cavities.
5. Take the advice of people who have what you want. Don’t listen to people who discourage you if you suspect they don’t have your best interests at heart or if they have something to gain from your staying stuck.
6. Look for alternatives. If you can’t afford the high-end closet organizing system you dream about, get a design estimate for one anyway, then look for ways you can build or create your own system that will accomplish the same functional goals even if you have to let go of the pretty wood finishes.
7. Imagine the worst. Go ahead, take yourself through the scenario of what you are really afraid of and then ask yourself, “Is it true?” or “Will this really happen?” If you are convinced it will,  then try a different route.
8. Get absolutely clear on what’s in it for you.  What would you stand to gain or lose? Is this really that important to you? If not, then it’s not going to motivate you to take action. Find something that you absolutely care about without question.
9. Do nothing for a while and wait to see if anything changes. Do you feel worse? Are others impacted by your indecision and do their feelings matter to you? Are you stressed by your own inaction? These are the times to ask for help since you know that something has to change but you know you can’t do it alone.
10. Ask yourself what is this costing me in terms of my time, money or my quality of life? Are you spending your time doing what you want to be doing? Are you able to afford what you need and a few extras too without feelings stressed about the consequences? Does your life feel rich with the things that really matter to you be them friends, family, community, a sense of purpose, fun, health or whatever else makes you happy? If not, then it’s time to make a change.

Spring. It’s that time of year when so many of us are inspired to clear out the old to make way for the new.  It’s more than just “Spring Cleaning.” It’s nesting!

Though the term is typically associated with preparing for childbirth, according to the World Dictionary,* nesting is defined as:

“The tendency to arrange one’s immediate surroundings, to create a place where one feels secure, comfortable, or in control”

There are several times in your life when you may find nesting helps express your personality and emotion:

• At the start of a new season
• When you’ve just moved to a new home
• When your (last) child living at home leaves for college
• In the weeks before undergoing a medical procedure
• During a career search
• While recovering from a loss, divorce or breakup
• Preparing for a loved one who is entering (or re-entering) your home

If you are feeling the urge to “nest,” here are a few simple tips to keep in mind that will help you achieve a greater sense of clarity and control.

1. Focus on one area at a time such as your office, cubicle or bedroom and resolve to finish the task even if it takes more than one session.
2. Start by clearing one surface space such as a desktop or even a bed. Having one clear space is a great motivator to keep you going and you’ll need it for the next step.
3. Sort like items into three piles Keep, Toss and Not Sure. The goal here is not to get stuck on the “Not Sures.”
4. Remove the items you no longer want or need by placing them in containers (bags or bins) for donating or recycling.
5. Identify the purpose of each “Not Sure” item and ask yourself, “Does this still serve me or enhance my life in some way?” If not, consider letting it go, donating it or re-purposing it as something you would probably use.
6. Assign a permanent home for the items you know you will keep and contain them with other like items especially if they are small to help you find them again.
7. Clean and/or dust areas as you go. Create a fresh space to resume the activity you do (or plan to do) in that space.
8. Enhance your newly organized space with something fresh or inspirational such as a vase of flowers, a piece of art work or a photograph you love to bring new life into the space.

When you’re done, go out and enjoy the beauty of Spring!